Comments for A Change in the Weather

Comment on Act 1. Chapter 1: October 31st - An uninvited guest by Scarlet

Scarlet — Tue, 22 Jun 2010 20:03:20 +0000

Wow!! A fantastic first chapter Rob. This story should be thought into being published!!

Comment on Act 1. Chapter 1: October 31st - An uninvited guest by Timothy

Timothy — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 14:19:03 +0000

Interesting and intriguing, I think I’ll read this more.

Comment on Chapter 17: The fight by Jacqui

Jacqui — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 07:33:34 +0000

Two quick typos.. of should be off and I thing you are missing the word umbrella before once more

“of guard, knocking him over. Wasting no time, Tobias grabbed the once more,”

Comment on Chapter 15: Worlds Apart by Jacqui

Jacqui — Wed, 30 Sep 2009 14:27:39 +0000

Tir Na Nog is actually spelt Tir Na nOg (land of the young).

Comment on Chapter 11: The last dragon by Rob

Rob — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 18:48:19 +0000

I am so glad that you are enjoying it! Please tell your friends if you like. The more the merrier :) Hope you find the time to read the rest.

Comment on Chapter 11: The last dragon by Skye HM

Skye HM — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 12:24:05 +0000

I am 11 and I love this book!

Comment on Chapter 43: The island by Daria

Daria — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 05:07:15 +0000

I love the picture your words drew of the island - the way it looked and how the moon shone and the night noises.

But this thought is stuck in my head, why aren’t the kids worried about their parents? If that had been me, the first thing I’d want are my mom and dad with me, to make sure they are safe. Just a thought.

Comment on Chapter 42: The carpet by Daria

Daria — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 02:36:01 +0000

Oh… a magic carpet! My absolute favorite bit of magic :) Thank you for adding that! *sigh* I think I lo…

Comment on Chapter 29: Bloody murder by Daria

Daria — Sun, 19 Apr 2009 22:32:20 +0000

No build-up or lead-in. I can assume what has led to the vicious attack, but there is no warning. I can accept the violence of it all, but perhaps more lead in: frustration, urgency, the building anger. I would leave out the graphics of what he has done, but a bit more background would make the attack more acceptable, in my opinion :)

Comment on Chapter 26: A warm welcome by Daria

Daria — Sun, 19 Apr 2009 21:29:59 +0000

Fire *shudders* Bad bad bad…

Comment on Chapter 22: Nimrod by Daria

Daria — Fri, 17 Apr 2009 04:48:14 +0000

Oh god. A cat.

Comment on Chapter 8: The Fay by Daria

Daria — Fri, 10 Apr 2009 04:00:24 +0000

Excellent! I felt as if I was walking with them through the Wood.

Never mind the questions, I actually took the time to look around the site :)

Comment on Chapter 6: The attic by Daria

Daria — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 17:00:09 +0000

A quick question, if the thatch roof has holes, wouldn’t the rain be coming through?

Love Thomas always breaking and smashing, reminds me of someone…

Also, how old are the children? Did you say and I just missed it?

I have an idea I know what is in the box ;)

Another excellent chapter.

Comment on Chapter 5: The Bearded Dragon by Daria

Daria — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 03:38:31 +0000

Intriguing chapter! I love the feel of the opening scene, with Tobias short-tempered and frustrated and the awakened memory with the unidentified menace, it has a movie-type quality to it.

Love the indecision with the beer and the enticing story of the axe. Love the parting scene with the girl sitting quietly crying at the end of the bed.

Why is it that I want to shout, “Stay away from the woods!”?

Nice work!

Comment on Chapter 4: Blakeby by Daria

Daria — Wed, 08 Apr 2009 19:34:22 +0000

Oh commas, what a love-hate relationship we have!

I’m not sure how relevant it would be to point out specific instances where sentences could be tightened up a bit, but, I will say that, all in all, it is a fantastic chapter. With the cottages heaped upon each other, and Mrs. “Cauliflower” (giggled at that) to meeting the old man and his dog once again, you’ve drawn a colorful, imaginative picture of the town preparing for a festival.

I love the bearded dragon, since I always picture mine with one. A long, white tuft, actually :)

Love the ending to the chapter- the speaking was boring, the fun was gone and it was starting to rain. I’d pack it in, too.

Excellent!

Comment on Chapter 3: Something stirred by Rob

Rob — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 23:12:13 +0000

Thanks Daria! Glad you’re enjoying the story. These early chapters were written about three years ago (before I started transferring it to wordpress) and I haven’t cleaned it up sufficiently. Hope you bear with it, and continue on.

Comment on Chapter 3: Something stirred by Daria

Daria — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 19:09:40 +0000

Yes, punctuation and comma issues, but you show great attention to detail. You’ve some awkward sentences - I’d remove ‘the test of time’ in the first sentence, for example. But you describe the storm and its force and power very well.

Well done.

Comment on Chapter 2: April 31st - The cottage by the wood by Daria

Daria — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 18:40:10 +0000

There are some sentences that could use a little polish,but, all in all, another wonderful chapter. I noticed “whole weeks worth” should perhaps be ‘whole week’s work,’ but it didn’t distract me from the meaning or story itself.

Nice re-introduction of the owl.

Comment on Act 1. Chapter 1: October 31st - An uninvited guest by Daria

Daria — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 18:29:57 +0000

Very nice set up; the cottage, the tarot cards, the hooded figure and the owl. Past mysteries and present danger. Nice use of language in creating mood and visuals.

Comment on Chapter 62: Unquiet slumbers by sumbodielse

sumbodielse — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 01:08:01 +0000

So… the demon howls and the weather thane turns